Post by Alexia Riddel on Jan 16, 2011 14:43:46 GMT -4
Dear spiral notebook,
You see you are not a diary or a journal because you are a spiral notebook. And well for some reason that makes me feel better about telling you everything I’m about to, I would like to tell you my entire story, up to right now and why I’m writing in you so here goes nothing:
My name is Alexia Heather Riddel, I’m 17 and at the moment I live in forks with my boyfriend John. There is a great story to how I got here, pregnant and lost my little sister. When I was very little, my dad left me and my mother Jenny, My mother got remarried, to some huge jerk. A few years later my mother had my little sister Sammi, Me and sammi are best of friends. But my Step father didn’t like me and I started to have to act up to get attention, no I didn’t need it but yes I wanted it. I started doing drugs and drinking, I never had sex though, I was always afraid of it. My parents found out about me doing drugs from my school that caught me with them on me. I was sent to rehab where I’m sure my parents were happy cuz they didn’t need to see me. I was in there about a month before they let me out. After getting out I never did drugs again. Everything went back to normal, until the one day when my stepfather and I got into an argument, He called me a stupid slut and told me to get out of his house, so I did. I left and I walked and walked and walked. I finally end up in the small town of forks where everything seemed okay; I met people who were nice to me no matter how mean to them I was. And I could still go and see Sammi in the night time, Well I got caught and that had to stop, they blocked my number from the home phone but they didn’t know I had gotten Sammi a cell phone just so I could talk to her. Well one specific day I was walking back to the house everyone seemed to hang out after I had seen an old friend from Alaska, and this big tall guy came out from behind a tree. I was mad and didn’t want to talk to him, so I just glared at him, when he asked me where I was going and if I knew of his brother I shook my head and tried to move around him, he stepped in front of me and now I was closer than I wanted to be, I should have been scared but at the time I wasn’t I had already managed to get free of a creep once before so if he tried anything I could get free, Suddenly I was pinned to the ground under the biggest guy I’d ever seen, and he told me he was going to teach me a lesson, And I screamed, I didn’t know what else to do. I was in the middle of the forest though so it didn’t do any good, I ran to the closest house I could sobbing, I was so scared I just wanted to go home, to curl up next to my sister and cry. But those days were over. I cried for days, everyone trying to comfort me. But it didn’t do any good. I felt dirty and lost, then I met John he was nice and helpful, I felt safe with him, I guess we kinda started to go out then. I few weeks later I had gone to the doctor for a check up, when they told me I was pregnant I sobbed and sobbed, And called John, He came and talked to me making me feel better, He was…. IS my knight in shining armor. I started having bad dreams about the baby someone always trying to take him away from me. I have a feeling the baby is going to be a boy since in the dream he always is. It scared me and I thought about getting an abortion but I can’t just can’t things have gotten better and I’ve started to see a therapist which is why I’m writing all this down, Its sort of my homework for the weekend. So there you go that’s my life from beginning to the present, its not pretty and I’m scared as hell to whats going to happen but everything happens for a reason right? Kay well I’m thirsty so I’m done writing.
Love,
Lexi
You see you are not a diary or a journal because you are a spiral notebook. And well for some reason that makes me feel better about telling you everything I’m about to, I would like to tell you my entire story, up to right now and why I’m writing in you so here goes nothing:
My name is Alexia Heather Riddel, I’m 17 and at the moment I live in forks with my boyfriend John. There is a great story to how I got here, pregnant and lost my little sister. When I was very little, my dad left me and my mother Jenny, My mother got remarried, to some huge jerk. A few years later my mother had my little sister Sammi, Me and sammi are best of friends. But my Step father didn’t like me and I started to have to act up to get attention, no I didn’t need it but yes I wanted it. I started doing drugs and drinking, I never had sex though, I was always afraid of it. My parents found out about me doing drugs from my school that caught me with them on me. I was sent to rehab where I’m sure my parents were happy cuz they didn’t need to see me. I was in there about a month before they let me out. After getting out I never did drugs again. Everything went back to normal, until the one day when my stepfather and I got into an argument, He called me a stupid slut and told me to get out of his house, so I did. I left and I walked and walked and walked. I finally end up in the small town of forks where everything seemed okay; I met people who were nice to me no matter how mean to them I was. And I could still go and see Sammi in the night time, Well I got caught and that had to stop, they blocked my number from the home phone but they didn’t know I had gotten Sammi a cell phone just so I could talk to her. Well one specific day I was walking back to the house everyone seemed to hang out after I had seen an old friend from Alaska, and this big tall guy came out from behind a tree. I was mad and didn’t want to talk to him, so I just glared at him, when he asked me where I was going and if I knew of his brother I shook my head and tried to move around him, he stepped in front of me and now I was closer than I wanted to be, I should have been scared but at the time I wasn’t I had already managed to get free of a creep once before so if he tried anything I could get free, Suddenly I was pinned to the ground under the biggest guy I’d ever seen, and he told me he was going to teach me a lesson, And I screamed, I didn’t know what else to do. I was in the middle of the forest though so it didn’t do any good, I ran to the closest house I could sobbing, I was so scared I just wanted to go home, to curl up next to my sister and cry. But those days were over. I cried for days, everyone trying to comfort me. But it didn’t do any good. I felt dirty and lost, then I met John he was nice and helpful, I felt safe with him, I guess we kinda started to go out then. I few weeks later I had gone to the doctor for a check up, when they told me I was pregnant I sobbed and sobbed, And called John, He came and talked to me making me feel better, He was…. IS my knight in shining armor. I started having bad dreams about the baby someone always trying to take him away from me. I have a feeling the baby is going to be a boy since in the dream he always is. It scared me and I thought about getting an abortion but I can’t just can’t things have gotten better and I’ve started to see a therapist which is why I’m writing all this down, Its sort of my homework for the weekend. So there you go that’s my life from beginning to the present, its not pretty and I’m scared as hell to whats going to happen but everything happens for a reason right? Kay well I’m thirsty so I’m done writing.
Love,
Lexi
